5 Tips for Transitioning Into a Human-Centric Leader

Good news: transitioning into a human-centric leader from a boss who is bossy IS, in fact, possible. Not only because #GrowthMindset runs the show here in this world of communication, but because leadership and communication are SKILLS. Meaning if you’re out to organize some my-way-or-the-highway-ness into sit-down-and-let’s-talk-through-this leadership, you’re in luck. 

Transitioning into a human-centric leader—admittedly—takes grit, dedication, and a constant willingness to check yourself, your reactions, and your patterns. 

And, it’s totally doable.

With the tools in hand, learning through mucking it up (because we all will - continuing to try + grow is what mattrs), and time under your belt putting them to work, there is nothing holding you back from becoming one of the most tuned-in and liberated human-centric leaders around.

5 Tips For Becoming A Human-centric Leader

Amp up your self-awareness.

There’s no denying it: the biggest changes happen when we start looking inside to understand the intricacies of who we are, and why we do what we do. 

In certain forms of therapy, the work is around congruence; seeking to have your inner world (values, goals, desires) match your outside world (words, actions). 

In the realm of Emotional Intelligence (aka EQ), it’s about creating an understanding of patterned behaviour, seeking to bring focus to how our emotions show up in our words + actions…and ultimately impact our effectiveness and performance. 

Self-awareness isn’t ‘esoteric’, ‘only for the spiritual folk’, ‘woo woo’, or ‘airy’. It’s a pragmatic and honest look at the inner thoughts + dialogues, and reflection on the way they manifest in what you do and say – giving you a chance to see the way you work, and choose whether or not it acutally works for you to keep that behaviour up.

Practice the pause & WAIT (Respond > React)

While you’re working to foster environments where your team feels safe to express themselves—and acknowledging your self-expression is equally as important—Human-Centric Leadership is also crafted around creating psychologically safe spaces that respect the dignity of every human in the space. 

Which means: blow ups, be gone.

There’s a part of the human brain—the limbic brain, inclusive of the amygdala—that’s programmed to (on a very high level) warn us of danger, and keep us safe. It was super helpful when telling us to run from Saber-Toothed Tigers (ahem…scientifically the Smilodon). Today, it can act as an achilles heel, as it identifies perceived danger to our emotions, identities, and egos with the same intensity.

Start by watching what happens in your body: when someone speaks up and you don’t agree with what they say; if their opinion goes against yours; or it fires you up in what could be a volcanic manner. Does your face get red? Your chest get tight? Your throat close? Do you sweat?

Hint: that’s your brain’s way of turning on your warning systems + getting you prepped for your fear response. Fight, flight, freeze, fawn? That’s this.

Next, watch for the thing you *want* to say as it bubbles up. Chances are, it’s something that will protect you in that moment; validate your position, validate your truth, devalue the other. 

And, while that may feel good in the moment...those reactions can have negative ripple effects - causing people to shut down and shy away from bringing thoughts, ideas or feedback to you.

Then: PAUSE.

Before opening your mouth when you feel the rising urge to defend, explain or validate yourself, WAIT. Watch your body. Listen to the first, second and third thoughts in your head. Discern what’s panic, and what’s purposeful. Then, respond in a way that’s aligned with the leader you’re committed to being, and the experience you’re interested in creating for the people on your team.

Then: WAIT.

WAIT (aka Why Am I Talking?) turns up the power of the pause; adds a hint of reflection about why you're about to lay down some words - and gives you a moment to get one level deeper and look at the thing that's driving what you want to say. Is it fear? Is it ego? Is it clarity + confidence? That's all there to discover in the WAIT.⁠⠀

Does this mean you need to ‘sit back’ if you’re being berated, belittled, shamed or otherwise? No. It simply means the way you engage in those *more* challenging conversations matters. Have your boundaries. Hold them. And, deliver your responses in a way that enforces them while staying as conscious of the other human you’re in dialogue with as possible.

Learning to respond (working with your emotions) versus react (being worked by your emotions) is important in any, and every conversation...making a massive difference in how your team—and everyone around you—trusts + knows they can bring anything to you, any time, and feel safe in the process. 

Lean into listening. 

It sounds so simple, right? Well, it’s more nuanced than letting someone talk while you nod along, giving the occasional ‘Uh huh’ while glancing at your phone.

And, it’s one of the most powerful ways to connect with your people, and really hear them while you work toward becoming a human-centric leader. 

One of the easiest ways to create more supportive listening is to eliminate distractions and give the other person your full attention. Sit in a quiet place with them, turn off your phone, your screens, close your door, sit still and give them the floor.

Don’t interrupt. Don’t interject. Simply let them speak.

Ask only clarifying questions—if and where there’s a break and only if the inquiry will help you better understand their position. 

When they are finished speaking, summarize what you heard them say. Try starting with “From what I understand, you…” or “What I heard you say was < fill in the blank >”. And, wrap up with ‘Is that accurate?’ or “Am I on track with what you were sharing?” This gives them a chance to better clarify their perspective, if needed.

The practice does 2 things:

1) Leaves other people feeling like they have been able to fully share their thoughts + feelings, and 2) Gives you the chance to fully understand what they’re saying through repeating back what you heard (which also contributes to their feeling-heard-ness).

Consider structures. Empower your people.

No two humans have the same lived experiences. And, in the case of communities we’ve traditionally (and continually) oppressed and marginalized, there are certain structures at play that, unaddressed, can not only impact an individual’s expression, but their core sense of safety and belonging in a group or a space.

Power structures that prop up the opinion of a ‘higher up’ or the maintenance of a system or ‘way we’ve always done things’ over the voices and experiences of the people within the business, effectively shut down the possibility of innovation and creativity. Unchecked power structures can also impact or influence the level of honesty or truth people bring to their interactions, especially if they’re living in fear of losing their job, getting harassed, or worse. 

Social structures can play into how safe people feel in conversation with you, especially if there’s a history of silencing, marginalization or oppression of a specific gender identity + expression, sexuality, ability, age, or otherwise within your organization or team.

Systemic racism is knitted through communities, companies, corporations (every sort and kind of institution) and the majority of systems that define the way our countries were built, and work today. And it’s real (check this Ben + Jerry’s article for some simple stats). And it absolutely plays out in the way Black, Brown, Indigenous and all People of Colour express themselves, communicate, and contribute in the workplace.

Part of transitioning into a human-centric leader is focusing on an anti-racism and/or anti-oppression education. With it in hand, the ways you make intentional space for voices to be heard across a business can be done in a way that honours the dignity + humanity of all people in your organization or team.

And, can be the catalyze to change ineffective systems + breakdown power structures to fully empower all the humans in your business.

Equitable practices in your leadership mean thoughtfully giving your people what they need—as individuals—to thrive. You’ll note, I intentionally used ‘equitable’ instead of ‘equal’ because in the pursuit of helping everyone ‘see over the fence’, everyone will need something a little different.

Doing the work to breakdown barriers and create equitable workspaces that are safe for every team member matters. Taking your own first steps of looking at what structures or systems, if any, may be influencing or impacting your ability to be in full human connection with the people around you is the perfect starting point.

Doing this with the support of skilled DEI (Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion) and/or Decolonization coaches and consultants is imperative. 

Balance strategy with humanity.

Remember: It’s not always about the bottom line. And, it’s not always about you (yes, I know, ugh — and….it’s true). 

Business goals are important. True. And, when their achievement comes at the expense of your people’s wellbeing, rest, sanity (the list goes on), they get further away; turnover increases time to full functioning in roles, trust deteriorates, productivity plummets.

When building a path forward for your team, consider what you want to get done, and how. Consider polling your team (collaboration is key) for their input on what they’ll need to be successful. Entertain the idea of making the process experiential AND effective; think of ways you can support your people through times of deep work and focus (beyond bringing in dinner while y’all work 16-hour days).  

You have human beings on your team–not human doings. 

Their capacity to be well while they work dictates what you can get done – make space for their humanity and see what happens. 

Remember:

Wherever you find yourself is perfect. And making even incremental shifts with your self-awareness, responses, listening, collaboration and people-focus will go a long way. 

That whole ‘marathon, not a sprint’ analogy? It applies here. Big time. 

So lace up those runners, because we’ve got some shuffling to do. 

(Maybe you look more like a gazelle when you run...I’m a for-sure shuffler)

The first time you put your full attention into one of your team and make them feel heard, understood and valued—authentically—they’re going to tell their coworkers something’s different. The news that you’re transitioning into a human-centric leader is going to spread real fast.

It’ll change the way your employees interact with you too, because human-centric leadership and conscious communication is wildly contagious (it’s science).

So get going, oh Human-Centric one, and start taking steps in the direction of stellar boss status.

And, if you need a little help, well...that’s what I’m here for.